OMG. So there is this viral video series that I have been following since my friend posted it on YouTube called “Shit Girls Say”. I am absolutely in love the guys that came up with it and am in love with the videos they have posted thus far. They perfectly encapsulated the humor, the insanities, and the preoccupations of a good chunk of girls including myself. Here is the first video of the series:
Now, there have been many spoofs of the original like “Shit Black Girls Say” and “Shit Asian Girls Say” which both induce uncontrollable giggles since they play on the common stereotypes (and truths? haha) of the girls of different races. However, neither caught my attention like this one: Shit White Girls Say…to Black Girls
As seen on Tosh.O this is one of my favorites mostly because I can perfectly relate to it. Is that bad? Nah, but it is completely true! I grew up in a predominantly white neighborhood and had predominantly white friends. I have encountered nearly everything on the above video. Growing up I was like—> O.o anytime anything of that nature came up. Like, really? Yes, you can touch my hair but don’t yank at it. Yes, IT IS REAL. No, I don’t live in a ghetto. Yes, I am educated therefore I speak well. If I carry around my little cousins, THEY ARE NOT MINE. I couldn’t have had children when I was 11. Yes, my dad is HISPANIC AND BLACK. No, he doesn’t speak Mexican, he speaks Spanish. YES IT IS POSSIBLE FOR A BLACK MAN TO SPEAK SPANISH. Just because there is one other black guy at school (back in middle school and high school) doesn’t mean we automatically date and want to be with each other. No, we don’t put up a white Jesus for Christmas. REALLY? No, I do not like grape drink or kool-aid. Yes, I eat collard greens and friend chicken. No, I DON’T LIKE WATERMELON YOU RACIST. JK. *Sighs*
“Do you like white guys? Because…it is totally okay if you do.” 
“Why don’t you have many black friends?”
Do you know where I live and go to school?
“You aren’t like all those other black people.” 
I am going to pretend like I didn’t hear that.
“Why doesn’t your hair grow fast?”
Look it up on the internet then come back to me for verification so you don’t get slapped
“You sure act white for a black girl.”
Oh I’m sorry. Let me pat my weave, poke my lips out, and smack on a chicken leg to make you happy. I could sure use a chicken leg after that comment.
As I reminisce over these events I have to laugh because some of the girls really don’t know what they’re saying. Lord, forgive them for they know not what they do. At times, I hope that they ask me those things and not someone else… To clarify, I hope they don’t go up to some hood girl thinking her response is going to be like mine because it won’t. I know for a fact, IT WON’T. So, to anyone who is reading this be warned. Not everyone is nice and forgiving and understanding. Don’t assume that all black girls want to slap you either. Be smart about it before it happens to you. Haha 