Cue the exasperated sigh and tears of frustration, right? However, this is absolutely true to any situation that did not go the way you were intending or the way that you expected. [insert more general observances that have little to no value] Let me tell you this: In the last year, shit got real. Excuse my French, but I didn’t feel like censoring at the moment. Everything that I had planned, everything that I had hoped to overcome, everything that I had set goals for and prepared for completely dissipated all because of this ridiculous, green, naïve little spoiled brat. She single-handedly ruined my, at the time, seemingly perfect life. I was doing well in school, I had a wonderful Summer experience (Researching transcription initiation factors, say what!?) and I had a firm goal to achieve: going to Medical School. All my hard work was almost wasted. My goal, which is still to go to medical school, was almost erased from eager, determined, bull headed mind. She changed the way I thought. She made me question what I wanted to do in life. She almost changed my morals permanently. She made me this sucky, negative version of former jovial self. She flippin’ brought out my dark side that I consciously kept locked away out of fear of knowing what it could do. I just went Freud up in here, oh yeah.
That crazy, manipulative, heifer was me. Shocker. Okay, I am not the best at suspense. I don’t care.
Me. I did all to myself. I let my guard down, experimented (get that disgusting connotation out of your mind that did not happen, EW), and rearranged my priorities for the worse. In retrospect–I hate saying this–it was because I didn’t listen to my dear, crazy dad. Ever since I could comprehend meanings of words he repeated three steps to how to succeed and be happy in life:
1. Never fear being alone
2. Never fear rejection
3. Engage in new, positive experiences as much as you can
Every. Single. Step was not followed. In the upcoming days, it will be observed on how these rules came back to haunt me a little late…
Better late than never.